Tuesday, August 23, 2005

Pat Robertson, Assassin

By now you have no doubt heard what the alleged Christian Pat Robertson said about the president of Venezuela, Hugo Chavez. Robertson said of Chavez, "...if he thinks we're trying to assassinate him, I think that we really ought to go ahead and do it."

Now let's stop right there for a moment. When Pat says "we," to whom do you think he is referring? The 700 Club? Wouldn't it be a hoot for all the little old ladies who watch Pat on TV to get together to plot that particular covert op? Do they make camouflage housecoats? Sharpen your knitting needles, ladies, we're going in!

Second question: When Pat says "assassinate," what do you think he has in mind? Like, as in actually kill the guy? That chapter of the Gospel according to John must have been ripped out of my Bible. You know, the chapter that tells about the time Jesus snuck up to the temple roof with a high powered rifle ... *uh* ... slingshot, and took out High Priest Caiaphas, who obviously was a threat to the security of the nation and a launching pad for pharisaic infiltration and Jewish extremism. Apparantly Pat the Assassin has that chapter in his version. May be a translation problem, I guess.


Pat the Assassin even has a justification for his murderous plot. Seems assassination would be more cost efficient than a war, not to mention that it is not as big a threat to an abundant oil supply. The Assassin says, "It's a whole lot cheaper than starting a war ... and I don't think any oil shipments will stop." (Hey, to give the guy credit where it is due, he's a lot more honest than President Bush has been.)

But let's just stop right there for another moment and take this opportunity to remind ourselves that Pat the Assassin claims to be a Christian person. What's more, he is a seminary graduate. It seems like he maybe ought to know better. This is more serious than "well, he is entitled to his own opinion." This is not a diversity thing. This person is grossly misrepresenting the Gospel of Jesus Christ on nationwide television, and he has got to be stopped.

Speaking myself as one who claims to be Christian, I can say with the certainty of faith that Pat the Assassin's ideas are about as far from Christian as you can get. As one of my good friends says with frequency, "I guess God made a few people that even He don't like."

Speaking myself as an American, I can say with certainty that Pat the Assassin should be criminally prosecuted for his inflammatory statements. At least conspiracy, if not something like instigating outright terrorism.

Somebody shut this guy up before he erodes any shred of relevance the church of Jesus Christ may still feebly grasp. Somebody stop this hateful man before he dumps a bucket of water on the last remaining embers of credibility the United States holds in the global community. President Hugo Chavez may very well be a jerk, he may be unfriendly to U.S. interests, he may be a chronic bed-wetter, I don't know! That's not the point.

The point is that an allegedly Christian leader has unapologetically called for the murder of another person, and that really pisses me off. The point is that Pat Robertson is a threat to the Gospel of Jesus Christ, while simultaneously claiming to represent that very same Gospel. He is a wolf wearing the Lamb's clothes, and he is deadly dangerous.

Wow! That guy makes me mad,
Andy B.

P.S. I read here that Robertson is ordained in the Southern Baptist Church, but can't find out much more info about that. Anyone else know if he is ordained for sure?

3 comments:

Micah said...

Robertson must have a version of the Bible with the character names reversed in John 11:49-50.

Also, my understanding is that he resigned his orders to run for President in 1988, but was reordained in a multi-denominational ceremony in 2000.

Chris said...

Your rant made me smile. But I'm also a little concerned (tongue-in-cheek). The subject is assassination, and I was taken aback to read from your keyboard: "he has got to be stopped," "somebody shut this guy up." Should I call you Pat?

Anonymous said...

All the more reason for us moderate Christians to let the world know that this man and those of his ilk are not the official voice of Christianity. To do so takes time, courage and money. So let's get going and make our voices heard. cb