Monday, September 19, 2005

Maybe Harps and Tamborines?

Dear Rainbow Readers,

I was privileged to overhear a fascinating theological conversation last Friday morning. I was a chaperone for our son Wesley's preschool field trip, and was driving three preschool boys up to the apple orchard. This profound exchange occurred between Wesley and his buddy Skyler.

It started with Skyler pretending to shoot imaginary "bad guys" out the back window of our car. Wesley said, "Skyler, Miss Spring (their teacher) says no guns."

Skyler repied, "I'm just shooting bad guys." The term "bad guys" as used by preschoolers, it should be noted, is not intended to be a gender-exclusive term. Cruella DeVille, for example, is one of the baddest bad guys there ever has been and ever will be as far as I am concerned. But I digress:

"Miss Spring says 'we don't do that here,'" responded Wesley sanctimoniously.

Skyler was frustrated, but not deterred. "Well, when I get to heaven, I'm going to shoot all the bad guys there!" he announced.

I was puzzled at this assertion, but Wesley did not miss the opportunity to challenge Skyler's eschatology. "There are no bad guys in heaven, Skyler."

This point deserved a little reflection. No bad guys in heaven, Wesley? Do you mean to say that all the bad guys go to a place other than heaven or are you implying that God's grace somehow turns everyone into a "good guy" when they get to heaven? If it is the former, will you explain to me your doctrine of grace, specifically contrasted with the notion of works righteousness? If it is the latter, how exactly is it that the "good guys" and the "bad guys" get along with each other in the midst of God's heavenly realm?

But Skyler took another tack. He does not give up easily, and will make a gifted lawyer or perhaps public official some day. He is creative and clever, and an amazingly articulate three year old. His reply, "If there are no bad guys in heaven, what are we supposed to do with all the guns and weapons and stuff?"

Aha! A good question. To which Wesley had the perfect answer. "There's no weapons there. I think we just get special musical instruments."

And that apparently settled the matter, because Skyler then abruptly changed the subject. I think he started talking about airplanes or something.

Hoping for a French Horn,
Andy B.


Seamhead said...

I want one of those big stringed instruments from India. You know, the ones that look like guitars on steriods with a whole bunch of strings.

David said...

That would be a sitar, seamhead. ; )

But I don't know, Andy. Having once endured an entire class of beginning violinists, I sure hope there are excellent music educators in heaven! ; )

Douglas said...

Bach is there. And Mozart. But though there will be lots of time to practice, since perfection will have been attained, we'd just all be together playing the masterpieces perfectly all the time. So no worries there!;-)

Dan Trabue said...

"what will we do with all the guns and stuff," indeed?

I like your site, I'll be back.

Any methodist with a son named Wesley has to be all right.